I get asked questions quite frequently on Tumblr. I enjoy hearing from people and always make sure to carve out enough time in my week to respond to almost every single question. The other day, I was asked a rather heavy question by an anonymous person (if you're not familiar with Tumblr, anonymous questions are quite common). I have sat on this question for a while, and while I responded in a timely manner, I just knew I had to publish it on my blog. I think a lot of people in the world probably have a similar question or have gone through a tough time, so I thought my response would be relevant to more than just this one person... life is all about perspective.
Question:
Your blog is one that I check daily along with a several others--I think it is great! They are all great reads, but do you ever feel like blogs can be hard to read in a way when only wonderful stuff is written about (ex. purchases, achievements, etc.)? I've been going through a hard time recently and reading blogs has become even more isolating. I guess I am wondering--is your life as amazing as it seems? Have you ever considered about writing about harder issues in life on your blog?
Answer:
Thank you so much, you are too sweet!! I definitely agree with you in that most blogs only talk about the ‘happy’, mine included, which I think can definitely make others who are going through rougher times, feel isolated, which is somewhat unfortunate!! I am so sorry to hear that you are going through a hard time— I wish you only the best and happy thoughts!!!
I think for the most part, my reasoning for only blogging about ‘happy things’ is because I don’t want to bring others down with my bad moods/misfortune. I write Summer Wind to inspire others to live a happy, full life (and a stylish one, too ;)!!). I want others to come to my blog for a dose of excitement and happiness.
I don’t want to sound as if I am bragging and live a life that is all roses, but I would say I lead a pretty happy life. I feel fortunate and thankful everyday. But I think that also has something to do with my mood and outlook on life. I try my very hardest to not let ‘bad things’ take away from my happiness. Sure, I don’t have a perfect life and I have certainly dealt with hardships and misfortune but I try not to live life with regrets and I try my hardest to always look at the silver lining of a situation.
For example, in 2010, I had a more somber post— it was a post about the death of my grandfather. It was a very tough time in my life, but as saddened as I was about his death, I remembered to be thankful that I got to spend as much time with him as I did.
I think social media, in general, brings about comparison to other’s lives. You just have to remember that no one’s life is perfect and there is no one that has it easy 24/7.
There will always be someone who has more than you, is happier than you, prettier than you, etc. but there are always people who have less than you, are sadder than you, are uglier than you, etc.
My life may seem ‘awesome’ on Summer Wind, but that’s not to say I’ve never been terribly hungover, experienced a death of someone close, received a bad grade on a test, had my heart broken, been lazy for a solid day, eaten something super unhealthy, spent too much money on something I shouldn’t have, made a mistake, etc.
But the way I look at it? That hangover was brought about by tons of fun the night before. The death of someone close makes me happy to have had someone so wonderful in my life and I was lucky just to have known them. A bad grade on a test? There are always other tests, you can always retake the course, you can always change your major, get a tutor,and luckily, grades aren’t everything, etc. Had your heartbroken? Won’t it feel that much sweeter when you finally find ‘the one’??? If it was meant to be, it would have been, so wait until it’s meant to be. Eat something super unhealthy? There are those that are so unfortunate that they are starving. If you feel bad about it, work out— which means you are healthy enough to do so. Spend too much money? Make a savings plan and work towards your goal to make up for it— get a second job on nights and weekends if you have to— it means you are fortunate enough to live in America where finding a job isn’t as hard as in many other countries.
It’s all about perspective, and I hope that with your situation that you are in, you can find that silver lining, no matter how small it may be. Surround yourself with friends and family who can only lift you higher!
There is a quote that I just love that I think will help you through your tough time:
'I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all, I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.'- Agatha Christie Keep your head up :)
I hope this post gives you a little perspective and encourages you to have a bright outlook on life-- no matter how dark your life may get! Have a fabulous day!
I think for the most part, my reasoning for only blogging about ‘happy things’ is because I don’t want to bring others down with my bad moods/misfortune. I write Summer Wind to inspire others to live a happy, full life (and a stylish one, too ;)!!). I want others to come to my blog for a dose of excitement and happiness.
I don’t want to sound as if I am bragging and live a life that is all roses, but I would say I lead a pretty happy life. I feel fortunate and thankful everyday. But I think that also has something to do with my mood and outlook on life. I try my very hardest to not let ‘bad things’ take away from my happiness. Sure, I don’t have a perfect life and I have certainly dealt with hardships and misfortune but I try not to live life with regrets and I try my hardest to always look at the silver lining of a situation.
For example, in 2010, I had a more somber post— it was a post about the death of my grandfather. It was a very tough time in my life, but as saddened as I was about his death, I remembered to be thankful that I got to spend as much time with him as I did.
I think social media, in general, brings about comparison to other’s lives. You just have to remember that no one’s life is perfect and there is no one that has it easy 24/7.
There will always be someone who has more than you, is happier than you, prettier than you, etc. but there are always people who have less than you, are sadder than you, are uglier than you, etc.
My life may seem ‘awesome’ on Summer Wind, but that’s not to say I’ve never been terribly hungover, experienced a death of someone close, received a bad grade on a test, had my heart broken, been lazy for a solid day, eaten something super unhealthy, spent too much money on something I shouldn’t have, made a mistake, etc.
But the way I look at it? That hangover was brought about by tons of fun the night before. The death of someone close makes me happy to have had someone so wonderful in my life and I was lucky just to have known them. A bad grade on a test? There are always other tests, you can always retake the course, you can always change your major, get a tutor,and luckily, grades aren’t everything, etc. Had your heartbroken? Won’t it feel that much sweeter when you finally find ‘the one’??? If it was meant to be, it would have been, so wait until it’s meant to be. Eat something super unhealthy? There are those that are so unfortunate that they are starving. If you feel bad about it, work out— which means you are healthy enough to do so. Spend too much money? Make a savings plan and work towards your goal to make up for it— get a second job on nights and weekends if you have to— it means you are fortunate enough to live in America where finding a job isn’t as hard as in many other countries.
It’s all about perspective, and I hope that with your situation that you are in, you can find that silver lining, no matter how small it may be. Surround yourself with friends and family who can only lift you higher!
There is a quote that I just love that I think will help you through your tough time:
'I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all, I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.'- Agatha Christie Keep your head up :)
I hope this post gives you a little perspective and encourages you to have a bright outlook on life-- no matter how dark your life may get! Have a fabulous day!
Yours,
14 comments:
I think this is so true! I try not to post about the hard times in my life, but I keep the same idea in mind; that I want to keep people happy and give them a place to find happiness and inspiration. It is definitely all about the "silver linings" :)
Hunter
Prep on a Budget
This is why I have followed you for years and still continue to check this blog every morning. You are such a fantastic role model, Sydney, and I hope you keep up with this blog and not leave any time soon!
xx
Really great post. I personally like to keep my blog "fun" too just because I'm not comfortable sharing more intimate details of my life on the internet. I definitely agree that social media causes us to frequently compare our life to others and that can be quite difficult.
More posts like this please!! This makes me love summer wind 100x more!!
I'm pretty sure I saw this on my tumblr dashboard when it was posted and I remember thinking how completely sincere your response was. I've followed your blog for years and have always thought of you as one of the more "real" bloggers out there. You might not throw out every detail of your life, good or bad, but there's a perfect balance. You're right, its all about perspective!
Love this post! I try to keep my blog "happy," too, but I received an email like this a while back and was inspired to share some of the not so pretty moments in my life. But you're right--attitude is so important!
Love that you've posted something that is close to your heart and with more depth. We all certainly compare our lives to others too much because of social media, but to be honest, a lot of people do guard their "darker" side so it's hard to know what their lives are really like. I always appreciate when a fellow blogger shows a bit more of their personal side and how you reached out to that reader and then sharing it here shows that you are human and do have bad days, but blogging only about the good days is not a bad thing. I think it's refreshing to see things through your (seemingly always) positive perspective!
-Chelsea
chelsandthecity.blogspot.com
I love love love this post! I sometimes feel very fake when I just go on and on about cute clothes, makeup, hair, etc., but I agree 100% with what you said: we post happy and sometimes frivolous things to entertain others and make them happy. I definitely have to keep reminding myself of this! Thanks so much for putting it in writing! :)
Poised and Preppy
www.poisedandpreppy.blogspot.com
Very true, great post! It's wonderful to see someone who can always find a bright side, even to some pretty not great things.
Allie
thenauticalprepster.blogspot.com
Wonderful post and agree with commenters: love that you wrote a thoughtful response. It must be hard to be a young person and see all these blogs-it can make life seem really superficial at times. I hope the anonymous poster is feeling better and btw, kudos for them to write a heartfelt question in a very gracious way.
-linda, ny
Your response was perfect. I read blogs for inspiration and recommendations, yours is one of the best.
This is such a great post! I struggle with being honest without over sharing. I think I will blog on this topic, thanks for the idea!
Whitney
www.MckenzieWild.blogspot.com
Thanks so much for your honesty--it is greatly appreciated! I worry that your message is lost when you say that there are always people who are uglier than you. I think, as women, we need to focus on non-physical attributes (such as determination and intelligence) as markers of success, not appearances.
That being said, I thoroughly enjoyed this post and your insight is really helpful--a sunny disposition can make all the difference in the world!
This post is great and your outlook on life is inspirational! I think your bright side comes across on your blog and I don't think a lot of people would expect you to share with everyone when things get you down.
It all about celebrating the fun things, having little treats, paying it forward, saying thanks, not keeping the 'good' handbag just for special occasions and my day is certainly made a little brighter with blogs I follow like yours.
Katie
Post a Comment